BADLANDS WAY

ooh, hey wait, about the title, it has nothing to do with the Bruce lee movie, ooh shit! Did I mention Bruce lee( I guess by now he is teaching Nechabudenezzar some martial arts)
Jeff shows up dressed like a marijuana addict clown, damn, let me start with the socks, did this guy just hack Gikomba's server,hell no,the socks are green with red stripes like the one Kanjo guys wears when chasing their ass up with hawkers who seems to be descendants of Homabay's passionate night runners.


The shoes, he tried, I'll talk about them another time. "Tobby, you remember her? "Jeff asks, "Nop, I don't "I answer him with my ass almost bursting out with laughter. He never looks this way, I know he is the king of blueticks and for this I think he deserves an Oscar, so that look can never be the one that he wears when he has been blueticked for the whole month because he is way used to it.

Ooh, about Jeff, I never told you about him, he is a rich kid that is way used to WI-FI I don't know how he will survive in heaven without it and about that I want you all today when praying ,pray for him, pray for him so that God caters for him a special room in heaven, a room with WI-FI, a room with a sandwich maker, a room with... let me just say everything.I was telling you about Jeff , this guy calls me for whole two hours, holy shit, the longest call I have ever made is 7 minutes 01 seconds and that was when I was trying to convince my teacher that I was my grandpa"Hello ,is this Tobby's school? am his grandfather and I wanted you guys to release him to come and attend his grandfather's burial" yaah, you already know where I messed,Jeff is my best friend, those savage best friends that will tell you on the face how ugly your girl is,that's the reason I stopped introducing my girl friends ooh no let me just say my friends who are girls.

Getting back to the point, "Tobby, you remember her? "Jeff asks, "Nop, I don't "I answer him,"Stop it, Alicia you know her right? "
"Nop, actually...yah I remember her, the one that blue ticked you for two weeks, the one with a face like queen Elizabeth, the one with Jeff Koinange's voice the way Ian Duncan puts it,the one with.... "
"Tobby stop it,she is pregnant"I hate this statement.I could tell that Jeff was stressed, he looked like Kevin Hart in a nude scene. I talk alot in this kind of situations, "Jeff if the baby turns out to be a boy name it after me, no no, after our deputy headteacher, no, that teacher that had the face like Undertaker that made us sleep on the cold floor or should we just name it Ruto?

"She is not pregnant for me",thank God I was not ready for night calls that would sound like this, "Hello Tobby, come pick me, she won't let me leave the house, and when coming , pick me diapers"
'Then why are you stressed?"I ask him, "I loved her" ppppppppppnknhehehehehe,actually that's how I burst out laughing. Jeff tickles me on the shoulder,"look at that girl"
"That one will blue tick you for the next ten years"
"And the one in tight up shorts"
"That will slice your dick off at night while sleeping"
"What about that one"
"You don't want ending up in ICU, that girl is big"
"The one in..................... (actually that's how our conversations goes on and on until we've finished licking a whole whisky bottle that we usually buy using our Mshwari loan).This might be the last post till December, am going on a long journey,but you'll still get more post from Cyril Tedd and guest writers,if you need me hit my DM,and help us share the post on your social media, just hit share on top of this post, Bye.